BDSM Database

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https://bdsmtrainingacademy.com/does-a-slave-deserve-to-be-happy/ Whether you are Dominant or submissive, you can’t have a BDSM relationship without the other. The question becomes, does a slave deserve to be happy in the relationship? The answer to this question is tricky, however, as many Dominants aren’t sure how to define happy and whether training or happiness is the more important goal. After all, contracts are nice, but a slave can always walk away from a relationship when it’s truly consensual. As a result, you might wonder what you need to do in order to keep your slave under your power. Here are some things you may want to consider. *********************************************************** Defining Happiness in the BDSM Relationship *********************************************************** Happiness is different for everyone, that’s for sure. Within your personal relationship, a slave and a Master needs to define what will make both of them feel happy within the relations...

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https://bdsmtrainingacademy.com/the-internal-motivation-of-a-submissive/ A submissive is a person that willingly gives over control to a dominant, either in a relationship or within a specific playtime. But what drives a submissive to want to give up this control? There are many different motivations, almost as many as there are submissives in the world. Understanding why a submissive decides to take over their slave role allows not only the slave to understand themselves, but also to help the dominant understand what a slave needs from them in order to feel fulfilled. *************************************************** The Pleasing Type *************************************************** Many submissives are interested in being in a BDSM relationship because they enjoy and get satisfaction from pleasing others. They like to do things that others ask them to do, and are often interested in showing the person doing the asking that they are willing to do ANYTHING in order to please. This...

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https://www.theaftercarelounge.com/post/fake-submissives Understanding Fake Submissives in BDSM: Recognizing the Signs and Dangers Today, I want to address a less vocalised issue within the BDSM lifestyle: fake submissives. While much attention is given to "fake Doms," the phenomenon of fake submissives is rarely discussed. This oversight can be detrimental, as fake submissives can disrupt the trust and integrity that are the bedrock of BDSM relationships. BDSM relies on trust, communication, and mutual consent. A genuine dynamic between a dominant (Dom) and a submissive (sub) requires honesty and transparency. However, the community is not immune to individuals who pretend to be submissive for various reasons, thereby undermining these essential principles. Traits of a Fake Submissive A fake submissive feigns submissiveness but lacks the genuine inclination or understanding of the submissive role. Key traits include: Inconsistency in Behaviour:  Genuine submissives consisten...

https://www.theaftercarelounge.com/post/fake-doms Unmasking the Charade: Navigating the Labyrinth of BDSM's Fake Doms In the occasionally perplexing world of BDSM, where desires and boundaries intersect, there exists an enigmatic figure known as the "Fake Dom." This intriguing persona brings a twist to the traditional power dynamic by cloaking themselves in a façade of dominance, often leading to a dance of disillusionment and revelations. So, let's embark on a journey into the realm of Fake Doms, where the illusion of control gives way to the truth beneath. Decoding the Illusion of Dominance: Beyond the Smoke and Mirrors Imagine a dynamic where dominance isn't genuine, but rather a performance art. Fake Doms are the master/mistress of this art, crafting an illusion of control that can be alluring at first but often unravels upon closer inspection. The Mirage of Authority: The Dynamic Defined Fake Doms create an atmosphere where the appearance of dominance is a ce...

https://www.devianceanddesire.com/2014/12/slave-position-training/ Position training is pretty much exactly what it sounds like. A set of body positions that are taught, corrected and memorised. It fits with some people’s style and it’s a turn-on, for others it’s as interesting as washing the dishes. You’ll know if it’s for you or not. I’ve heard it talked about in terms of Old Guard Leather positions, but I’ve never seen any evidence that such protocol ever existed. Most commonly it’s associated with Gorean lifestyle. Those who incorporate it into their lifestyle will talk about some benefits. It’s obviously an abbreviated way for a Dom to maneuver a sub’s body into the position he wants, but less obviously it’s also a way for Him/Her to direct changes in the sub’s head-space. Positions are physical, but they are attached to meaning. In the same way that forcing yourself to smile can actually make you happy, a position like the Gorean Bracelets carries a certain head-space with it. Th...

the original article is from a now-defunct website. the link is from webarchive. https://web.archive.org/web/20230810091107/https://houseofeadarainn.webs.com/ceremonyoftheroses.htm The Roses ceremony is essentially a BDSM wedding. It is the ceremony when a Dominant formally collars his/her submissive (who is 'graduating' from a training collar). Vows are exchanged, the sub may be re-named, and there is a great deal of symbolism and tradition. There are not many places on the internet to find an actual Roses ceremony written out. It describes the ceremony but it doesn't do it justice, in our humble opinion. It is such a symbolic beautiful thing, and it was thought that writing it out would go some ways towards showing just how beautiful and meaningful it is. If you want to download it for your own use, by all means do so, it is meant as a kind of template for those that want to be a little more traditional. Some of the wording can be changed to make it your own, but at least...

things one may do outside of a dynamic to prepare for one's future life serving a D-type. wake at the same time every day get out of bed immediately upon waking meditate on your intentions and on your goals as an s-type have set routines for personal care and personal growth personal hygiene, exercise, journaling, practicing spirituality, etc. drink plenty of water per day eat balanced meals go to bed at the same time every day set up modes or detoxes to block distracting apps during resting hours use do-not-disturb to limit notifications and put screens in grayscale perhaps even keep all devices in a separate room from your sleeping area practice silence doing activities with no audiobooks, videos, podcasts, music, etc. chores and housework meals commuting extended periods of not speaking unless directly spoken to keeping responses thoughtful but concise practice submissive poses modify if necessary for any physical disabilities reading. lots of reading. not just one genre, but a ...

https://submissiveguide.com/articles/fundamentals/how-can-i-train-myself-to-deepthroat/ Question: What is the best way to train oneself to deepthroat? How to get rid of the gag reflex? Answer:  Great question! The main reason for the gag reflex is to prevent you from choking, so it’s not advisable to stop it completely. That said, there are various ways to desensitize your gag reflex response so you don’t respond so aggressively. The one that appears to be working for me is accustoming the trigger point in my mouth to touch. Toothbrush One technique you can try is taking your toothbrush and slowly moving it toward the back of your tongue until you feel close to gagging. You can then brush that area for 15–30 seconds. You should attempt to do this twice daily until you no longer feel the urge to gag from brushing in that area. At this point, you can move your toothbrush back slightly further and repeat the process. Dildo A similar technique is to use a smaller dildo that you can’t ...

it seems as though submissiveguide is revamping the website, and as such all of the previous links for their articles are completely broken. i will add fixing all of them to one's to do list. in the meantime, i wanted to thank all of Y/you who have been visiting the database. it's certainly a passion project, providing a space with resources for proper BDSM education. i'm grateful P/people are getting a good use out of it. 🥰

https://www.submissiveguide.com/personalgrowth/articles/obedience-a-covenant-of-submission and https://www.submissiveguide.com/personalgrowth/articles/obedience-a-slavey-meditation As I continue to delve deeper into my journey as a slave, I have come to the point where I am giving another round of contemplation to matters I once saw as pretty straightforward – one being the matter of the connection between submission and obedience in regards to hierarchical relationships. There seems to be more to the act of obedience that goes beyond only obeying the directives of the Owner as they are given. Philosophically speaking, a person can definitely be obedient without submission; that is simply a matter of doing what one is told, following a set of rules or guidelines. This is something we do every day; an appropriate example of this can be found in the workplace or how we obey traffic laws (usually). However, I posit that within the realm of Power Exchange/Authority Transfer based relations...

https://www.submissiveguide.com/personalgrowth/articles/what-does-breaking-a-slave-mean There is some recent discussion of "breaking a slave" going on on the popular social network, FetLife right now. I'm watching it spread across the groups that I'm in and thought I'd not chip into those discussions but share my thoughts and opinions on it right here. These are not the only interpretations and I don't expect everyone to agree with me. I do encourage you to share your thoughts in the comments. There are two separate meanings when it comes to breaking a slave. The first I'd like to cover is breaking IN a slave. In this meaning, training is meant to adjust the slave's core attitudes and behaviors to be more in tune with the Master. Think about the things you typically break in; shoes, furniture, gloves, hats. All of these you've flexed and bent to fit into your mold and hold its shape, whether this is your feet, your behind or your head. The same goe...